LESSONS OF MY 81ST BIRTHDAY July 10, 2025

Wednesday, thanks to genetic good fortune, I turned 81 and became, as I am wont, reflective about life and death. I’ve outlived my father, Morris, who died at 80. I’m grateful to be of sound body and mind, although part of my personality remains 15. Carolyn will tell you, it takes a sense of humor to live with an 81-year-old adolescent.

Kitsch warning: Nearing my birthday, I thought about the Disney musical—film and stage—“The Lion King.” Okay, not the greatest story ever told. But the opening scene for the stage show—we saw it in Los Angeles, then in San Francisco—was awesome.

“The Lion King”—Disney is not paying me—produced a major hit song, “The Circle of Life.” That’s what I’ve witnessed in recent days yet again.

To begin, July is a major month in my family. Two of my children, Seth and Yosi, also were July babies. So was my brother-in-law, Herb. And my Aunt Anne—my long-gone “second mother.” The flip side: Herb died at the end of July a few years ago. 

But life continues. On the Fourth, a precious girl was born to my friend Collin, whom I mentored for conversion, and his wife Hanna. Two years ago, we attended their wedding in Portland, Maine. We greeted Selah Eleanore with great joy. But

there’s an old saying, “What goes around comes around.” 

A wonderful congregant from our synagogue, Dorothy, died a week ago. She was 92. Carolyn and I attended her memorial service last Monday. 

I don’t write this to be maudlin. As my mother, Blanche, always said, “Death is part of life.” She learned that from her mother, who learned that from hers. Each endured the death of her mother, as I did mine. As it happened, three of my mother’s five siblings died before she did. So did many in-laws. That generation is gone now. But my mother taught me to acknowledge the pain and keep embracing life.

So, July for me is a month filled with life and death. These experiences are basic to the human condition. We are, in effect, born to die. As God tells Adam after he and Eve eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Bad and are to be exiled from Eden, “By the sweat of your brow / Shall you get bread to eat, / Until you return to the ground— / For from it you were taken. / For dust you are, / And to dust you shall return” (Genesis 3:19).

I know my time is limited. So I take each day as it comes, do the little things I love, enjoy every minute I can. Wednesday night, Carolyn, Aaron and our son-in-law, Jeremy, celebrated at Izzy’s Steaks & Chops in the Marina then came home for Black Magic chocolate cake from Sweet Things by Jane. Loved it!

Of course, something always goes south. I deal with it and tell myself that tomorrow will be a better day. Someday, tomorrow may not look particularly rosy. But difficulty and loss are the price we pay.

If all of us can recognize how precious life is—ours and others’—we can keep the circle of life open and expand it. When we die, our memory will be for a blessing.

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